Holly Knoll

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3 Tips To Get Your Confidence Groove Back (you'll never guess what they are)

Your confidence is in there… promise.

The job offer didn’t come. A potential client said “no”. Your annual review was not-so-hot. Sometimes we could all benefit from a little boost of confidence. Even you’re confident most of the time, confidence hits can sneak in depending on the day or the events happening in your life. But not to worry, we’ll work through this!

This has definitely happened to me more times than I can count, and if I’m not careful, the confidence weeds have the potential to quickly overrun my beautiful garden of peace I work hard to cultivate in my mind every single day.

Over the course of my career I have interviewed for many jobs (freelancing and as an employee), of which I have definitely had some disappointing rejections. I know first hand that hearing “no”, can be tough - especially when you so want it to be yes. I also know the hit hearing “no” over and over again can take to one’s confidence.

So if you’re currently in a place where you’ve heard “no” maybe one too many times, and you’re thinking about throwing in the towel bear with me for a minute.

Why not trying something unconventional to get your groove back? Something BOLD?

When you set out to create something and provide a service for clients, you have to be bold. It’s the nature of the beast. The act alone, or entrepreneurship, is one that requires incredible boldness. So what are some ways or different areas where you can harness that and really begin to practice boldness? How can you repeat acts of boldness, potentially in other areas of life, to create a bolder you? To become someone more willing to take risks, or impassioned by what they’re doing?

Today I’m unpacking places where you can practice boldness in your non-business life, that will generally instill boldness in you, and inevitably affect the way you do business, for the better. 

Read on for how to become your best you this year and why that will, without a doubt, make you a better business owner. Let’s dive in!

  1. Volunteer for a cause you truly care about. I’ve been volunteering work with Dress for Success, and wow - are the stories of the women I meet ever inspiring! What they’ve been able to overcome and build for themselves is truly incredible.

    Volunteering is a way to reset, refocus, and gain new perspective. As a business owner, and even as a corporate employee, it can be very easy to get stuck down in the trenches and the mundane cycle.

    Allowing yourself designated time to connect with others outside of work, learn something new, and hear a story you haven’t heard before can be like a girl-splashing-Neutrogena-cleanser-on-her-face commercial moment for you. A refreshing perspective is so important in making business (or even career decisions) for yourself. 

    Volunteering can help you appreciate what you have. You never really know what you’re signing up for or what you’ll bring to the table vs. what you’ll walk away having gained. Giving back your time will fill your soul with goodness and allow you to reflect a better version of yourself into the world. That will also inevitably radiate on to your clients, your network, your staff, etc. aka make you a better business owner! Ta-da!

  2. Commit to trying something new. Now, I might be oversimplifying this a bit - but that’s the point. It IS simple! Committing is key. I’ve been toying around with taking a knife skills class forever (because my chopping skills, y’all). I’m doing the dang thing this month!

    I'm not just saying think about it, or get online and look up what’s available, take 4 months, and then show up to a yoga class 15 mins late with a pissed off energy from your hellacious commute.

    I’m talking plan ahead and really sign up. Like pay and sign on the dotted line for something you’ve never done before. A cooking or workout class, trying a new hobby, an online college course in an area you’ve always loved or been curious about. Stretch yourself!

    Learning something new helps you strengthen your improvisation skills in a world of unpredictability. The more you can teach yourself be present and learn on the fly the faster you’ll move forward, build confidence and have a new glow which your clients can see a mile away!

    I mean I’d rather do business with someone with a glow with someone who is grumpy and stressed out. Trying new things will also teach your mind how to creatively solve problems and will give you tenacity so you’re not easy to give up or be “too tired”.

    By doing new things you’ll soon recognize challenges as normal so that you aren’t thrown off by unpredictable situations.

  3. Travel or spend time solo! This is something so near and dear to my heart and has definitely played a key role in my business decisions and overall confidence. (Keep your eyes out for more content coming to an email inbox near you on this in the very near future.)

    No matter your status - single, taken, married, not sure… dedicate time to traveling solo. Even if it’s for a day, or for all the busy moms out there a few hours count, too!

    When you spend time alone in a place you’ve never been, you’re already standing about a football field in length away from the edge of your comfort zone. There are so many little acts of choosing to be alone for a time, that you get to roll up into one when you travel alone, but you can also practice the little things at home while doing things you haven’t tried before.

    For example, I’ve traveled for work for many years in my past. And because of this I had the choice to order room service or get out and try a new restaurant and experience the culture of the city I was in. Most of the time, I opted for eating out!

    Ever since eating out alone has become such a treat and a great way for alone time. I get to pick everything - where I go, what I eat, at what time. I mean… who doesn’t love to make allll the decisions sometimes?

    Give it a shot! Try eating alone at a restaurant you’ve been curious about. I love using Eater to find new restaurants - choose your city, and voila, a ton of GOOD choices will pop up for you to try!

    Once you get to your place of choice, put your phone down, and really savor the flavors of that Pinot, become friends with your waiter, and sit in a big window where you can watch the world roll by. Sound awkward and terrifying? Yay! Do it anyway, you’re going to do great. I love bringing my Kindle or a journal to do some reflection.

    Another idea, visit a museum or take a tour in your own city and talk to strangers (gasp!). These are all instant confidence boosts because, as formerly mentioned, you’ll be way way outside the border of your comfort zone and did I mention that builds confidence?! I love visiting the SF MOMA alone, to say nothing of the random creative ideas that spring up when I’m there.

There's just something super interesting about going to a completely foreign place - country or otherwise, and knowing it's just an experience that you share with you and you alone.

When something goes wrong, because it often does, especially with travel, knowing you can work through it is a HUGE booster, too! Between canceled flights, miscommunication and language barriers, the phone dies and you lose access to your map, there are so many areas for you to teach yourself that no matter what, you will survive! And, the best part is, you’ll be better for it!

Ultimately, each of these things will teach you new perspective and allow you to peak your head up from under that pile of work on your desk or that mundane cycle you’ve found yourself in. You’ll learn new interesting things about yourself, and others (potential clients?), and ways to remain confident in all areas of life, not just business. When you, as an individual, are allowing yourself to remain dynamic, on your toes, happy, excited, and confident, there is no way you will fail. 

There you have it, the secret formula for to get your confidence groove back. It actually has nothing to do with success or business decisions at all. Which one will you give a try?

Holly works with professionals to create services-based businesses using expertise and strengths they already have. Holly is the creator of The Consultant Code, a program will have you up, running, and profitable with your services-based business in 60 days or less! Want to learn more? Drop her a note at: holly@hollyknoll.com